Pope on the Meaning of Charity

“St. Paul then tells us that charity ‘is not arrogant or rude, it does not insist on its own way.’ These two characteristics show that those who abide in charity are not self-centered. The self-centered inevitably become disrespectful; very often they do not even notice this, since ‘respect’ is precisely the ability to acknowledge others, to acknowledge their dignity, their condition, their needs. The self-centered person inevitably seeks his own interests; he thinks this is normal, even necessary. Those ‘interests’ can even be cloaked in noble appearances, but underlying them all is always ‘self-interest.’ Charity, however, makes us draw back from the center in order to set ourselves in the real center, which is Christ alone. Then, and only then, can we be persons who are respectful and attentive to the good of others.”
“Charity, St. Paul says, ‘is not irritable, it is not resentful.’ Pastors close to their people have plenty of opportunities to be irritable, to feel anger. Perhaps we risk being all the more irritable in relationships with our confreres, since in effect we have less excuses. Even here, charity, and charity alone, frees us. It frees us from the risk of reacting impulsively, of saying or doing the wrong thing; above all it frees us from the mortal danger of pent-up anger, of that smoldering anger which makes us brood over wrongs we have received. No. This is unacceptable in a man of the Church. Even if a momentary outburst is forgivable, this is not the case with rancor. God save us from that!"

— Homily at the consistory and creation of 20 new cardinals, Feb. 14, 2015